COLUMBUS, OHIO -- In an April 1 press release announcing plans to
unleash their highly anticipated 5th album in 2019, Columbus
psychedelic rockers Floorian have expressed regret that the release
could hit the streets around the same time as the new album from
experi-metal titans Tool, and likely steal some of their thunder --
and sales.

"It's too bad, but it is simply unavoidable", said a spokesperson for
Floorian's vast marketing team, adding that Floorian band members have
no ill-will toward Tool and are sure that Tool will land on their feet
despite the timing faux pas.

Tool's label and management have yet to respond to the news, although
band members have already chimed in. Lead singer Maynard James Keenan
reacted with a single-word tweet, "who?". When guitarist Adam Jones
and drummer Danny Carey were asked about the timing of the release
during an interview, they responded in unison, "who?". And bass player
Justin Chancellor replied to our email inquiry, saying, "yeah, those
guys rock, but who cares?".

In a related development, a handful of internet news outlets have
reported Tool's plans for an upcoming tour with The Who and some guy
named Florian filling in on drums. .

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